Dear Mc Donalds,
Are you brainwashing me?
I'm generally not super paranoid, but I'm just wondering about this because sometimes, when I'm not even hungry, I have the urge to stop by and order a cheeseburger. I don't even eat meat anymore for God's sake. I might be willing to let this slide, because at one point in my life, I really did love your cheesburgers. However, sometimes I even stop by and order things I didn't even know you had (Rolo McFurry???).
I have no concrete proof of said brainwashing, but if I find out you have, I am for sure going to sue you...and I am going to win, just like the hot coffee lady.
I've given you fair warning. I do not want to see myself stopping by ever again.
Yours truly, Shelly